Wills: The Last Weapon Of The Dead By Johnson Babalola

Wills are often seen merely as legal documents to distribute assets and settle affairs after death. However, some Wills serve as a final, potent means for the deceased to leave behind messages that reflect their relationships, personal interests, and lingering sentiments. These unusual and humorous bequests can reveal a great deal about the deceased’s life and their feelings towards those they left behind. Here’s how the dead use their last opportunity to communicate, leaving messages that transcend traditional estate planning.

1. Relationships and Marital Dissatisfaction
Wills can be a platform for the deceased to address personal grievances and dissatisfaction. A notable example is the bequest famously attributed to John George Mergendoller, who, with a touch of sardonic humor, wrote:

“To my wife, I leave her lover, and the knowledge that I was not the fool she thought me; to my son I leave the pleasure of earning a living. For 20 years he thought the pleasure was mine; he was mistaken.”
This quote not only reflects Mergendoller’s dissatisfaction with his marital relationship but also serves as a final commentary on his relationship with his son, encapsulating lessons he wished to impart even after death.

Similarly, Sir William Maynard left a bequest to his daughter with a note of dissatisfaction toward her spouse: “I bequeath to my daughter , as she will need it, since she has married a worthless man.” Such bequests not only reflect personal dissatisfaction but also serve as a final commentary on their relationships.

2. Humor and Irony in the Face of Adversity
Humor often plays a role in Wills, with the deceased using it as a final tool to convey their wit or to settle scores in a lighthearted manner. Samuel Bratt’s Will is a prime example: “I leave my wife on condition that she smokes five cigars a day for the rest of her life.” This bequest was a response to his wife’s prohibition on his smoking during their marriage, combining humor with a personal vendetta.

Similarly, Lord Farnborough’s bequest of “one shilling because she has already received plenty” serves as a sharp, ironic commentary on the nature of his marriage and the financial expectations within it. Such Wills reflect how humor can be used to mask deeper feelings of frustration or unresolved issues.

3. Personal Interests and Quirks
Some Wills reveal the personal interests and eccentricities of the deceased. George Bernard Shaw, ever the intellectual, left instructions for the future publication of his plays in an improved alphabet, reflecting his dissatisfaction with the current one: “I desire my executors to provide for the future publication of my plays in an alphabet better adapted to the English language, which is incapable of spelling words correctly.”

Jack Benny’s bequest to have a single red rose delivered to his wife every day for the rest of her life speaks to his enduring love and affection. This daily reminder of his presence illustrates how Wills can be used to maintain personal connections beyond the grave.

4. Legacy and Symbolism
Wills often serve as a medium for passing on symbolic legacies. Robert Louis Stevenson’s bequest of his birthday to Annie H. Ide is a sentimental gesture, turning a personal milestone into a lasting gift: “I, Robert Louis Stevenson, author of Treasure Island, do hereby bequeath to the said Annie H. Ide, the twenty-fifth day of November, heretofore known as my birthday, to be hers henceforth.”

Heinrich Heine, with a more sardonic twist, left his estate to his wife on the condition that she remarry: “I leave my entire estate to my wife on the express condition that she remarry immediately. Then there will be at least one man who will regret my death.” This bequest reflects a final, ironic comment on his marital relationship and his own legacy.

5. Moral Lessons and Final Statements
Some Wills are used to impart final lessons or moral statements. Sir Thomas Cookes left to his cousin but only if he refrained from smoking tobacco, and Henry Budd’s bequest was forfeited if his heirs grew a mustache. These conditions reflect the deceased’s personal values or quirks and serve as a final attempt to influence the behavior of their heirs.

6. The Lasting Impact of Bequests
Through these final statements, Wills provide a unique window into the personalities and relationships of the deceased. Whether driven by love, dissatisfaction, humor, or personal principles, these bequests serve as a final opportunity for the deceased to leave a lasting impact on those they leave behind. They transform the mundane process of distributing assets into a stage for personal expression and final commentary, showcasing the power of Wills as a profound and sometimes humorous weapon in the hands of the deceased.

In summary, Wills can be much more than legal documents; they can be the ultimate form of personal expression, allowing the deceased to send final messages, settle scores, or impart lasting lessons to the living.

Johnson Babalola, a Canada based lawyer, leadership consultant and corporate emcee, is a public affairs analyst.